My father-in-law had been in the ICU for three days, unresponsive. His family had surrounded him throughout the days, for as long as we were allowed to be there. To my surprise, when my daughter and I arrived at the beginning of visiting hours on Thursday to take up another silent vigil, he was awake, alert, talking and so happy to see us. We were given the gift of two uninterrupted hours with him, holding his hands, and listening to him as he blessed each of our family members. He would not stop talking and reliving so many special events…
What Hat Do You Wear: Primary Caregiver, Primary Care Manager or Both? by Dr. Ronda Wells
What Hat Do You Wear After fifteen years of caring for four elderly family members, sometimes all at once, I learned the hard way there’s a big difference between caregiving and care-managing. An understanding of what “hat” you wear can be helpful to understand the tasks required, and hopefully to delegate some of those to share the load. Your “hat” also lets you communicate better with professionals involved in your loved one’s life. Most people know what is meant by primary caregiver (PCG)—a person(s) who does repetitive, daily, hands-on care of a loved one that includes: feeding bathing toileting giving…
God Doesn’t Waste a Hurt by Deborah Malone
Thank you, Loretta, for inviting me to share my experience with caregiving. This is a much-needed topic for those who find themselves in the position of being a caregiver to a loved one. My experience as a caregiver started at a very young age. I can’t remember when I didn’t feel the overwhelming responsibility that comes with being a caregiver. My mother was diagnosed with Rheumatoid Arthritis when she was only 12 years old. After being bedridden for a couple of years, she went into remission. Mother was from Cincinnati, Ohio, and my dad was from Opelika, Alabama. Talk about…
Caring for Mom, an Alzheimer’s Patient by Loretta Eidson
I had never thought much about Alzheimer’s or dementia until I recognized the symptoms in my mom. Early on, I took her to the doctor about her declining memory. She grew very upset with me for accusing her of not remembering. Though it hurt my feelings that she thought I was being mean to her, I knew in my heart something needed to be done, but I had to wait until she realized the decline herself. A few years later, mom commented her best friend started taking medicine to help her memory, and she wanted to get some. She never…
Who Will Open the Door Today? by Tess
I live in the same city as my parents. Today, they still live independently. My mother and father have been married for sixty-two years and have known one another since elementary school. I go over often to spend time with them as often as possible because I know having them in my life is a blessing. Over the past few years, I’ve watched as my father’s memory has slowly declined, and in the past year, the decline seems to have moved to a new level. As I drive to their home many days, I wonder who will open the door…
